Days Like This

Is it just me, or does working for a giant corporation, that could buy half the world, suck? I mean, they pay me diddly squat to do something a monkey could do, but then add all these retarded rules that a monkey wouldn't obey. Like I can't be on the internet, or I can't be on the phone, or I can't throw poop at the passers-by. If I'm doing the job of a monkey, then I expect the privileges of a monkey DAMN IT! Yes, I want to eat fleas off my co-workers while I click a mouse button all day. I know that I should just be thankful to have a job and I shouldn't complain, but what's the fun in that?

You know I just had the best thought for a new office concept! Tree Top Offices. Build a tree-house with an office in it that is fully connected to the information super highway. What better way to become one with nature while still earning a living? GADZOOKS! Well, I'm copyrighting or patenting this idea currently, so nobody try to steal it!

Does anyone have any cool Jello Shot recipes other than the vodka variety?