Random Thoughts
#1 kd Lang sounds great, but every time I see her I think of Vince Gill, who also sounds great. I'm led to believe they're related. In fact, they may very well be identical twins, but she got a vagina....and he got the chest? His is bigger than hers these days. If they're not related, and if she didn't like other women, they'd make a good couple. Actually, they could get together if they'd move to Utah and become Mormon. Vince could stay married to Amy Grant and marry kd Lang too. That way they'd all be "satisfied".
#2 Alanis Morrisette's song "Ironic". What exactly is so ironic about a black fly in your Chardonnay? I'd pick that sucker out and keep drinking. Ain't no little fly gonna ruin my buzz! If it were a coagulated blood ball in my Chardonnay, then we'll talk. Otherwise, you'll find me begging for change by the wine shop or passed out in a pile of trash behind the nearest wine tasting location. Yeah, I think Alanis is a big baby, remember when a bunch of Alanis's were in that car in the MTV Video...well one of them was acting like a baby, and that's probably the one that thinks a fly in wine is ironic.
#3 Wine Tasting - It tastes ok going down, but after "tasting" too much I get sick and the second round of wine tasting begins, which is to say, I yak. After "tasting" nearly a bottle of cheap Merlot I was on my way home and had to pull over and let lose what "IRONICALLY" looked like coagulated blood balls. (Good thing it wasn't near my Chardonnay). The balls were actually matzah balls I didn't chew well enough. (I was trying to stop the burning of the acid reflux caused by the cheapest wine ever). Suddenly.....
#4 I found myself sitting in front of a hospital. What better place to get sick from drinking? The police would think you're just on your way to the ER for the flu, not because you've just ingested grape juice that sat a long long long time in a barrel in France.
#5 Red wine on tan carpet stinks, and stains. Stinky Stain. This right before a yearly family reunion 2 hours away driving in a car without an air conditioner in August. Matzah balls, though they may stay together going down, and coming back up, tend to fall apart when you try wiping them up with your sock. Also, be careful not to step on them once you've taken your shoes off to get your sock. It's so nasty. Slimy. So it was a slimy stink stain STUCK on my sockless shoeless sweaty foot skin.
#6 Bulimia is a lot of work and money for someone that doesn't even like to exercise. I mean you have to eat all this food (chew, chew, chew) then find a place to puke. Then clean up the mess. Why not just chew the food and not swallow? Spit the chewed food in a cup and feed it to underprivileged babies. Hey! It works for mamma birds. If someone is going to spend all that money on food just to get rid of it 5 minutes later, why not kill two birds with one stone and help those less fortunate that don't have teeth yet? Besides there's got to be a tax write off here somewhere for the donation. (That's 3 reasons not to swallow).
#7 If you were thinking a dirty comment about "3 reasons not to swallow" then you're truly strange. Overlooking the fact I've just said I think kd Lang should marry Vince and Amy Gill, I'll drink wine containing bugs, I've stepped on a puke matzah ball, and bulimics shouldn't swallow, they should spit the food in babies mouths....I think I'm pretty normal. Besides isn't "normal" relative?
Just a few thoughts.....
#2 Alanis Morrisette's song "Ironic". What exactly is so ironic about a black fly in your Chardonnay? I'd pick that sucker out and keep drinking. Ain't no little fly gonna ruin my buzz! If it were a coagulated blood ball in my Chardonnay, then we'll talk. Otherwise, you'll find me begging for change by the wine shop or passed out in a pile of trash behind the nearest wine tasting location. Yeah, I think Alanis is a big baby, remember when a bunch of Alanis's were in that car in the MTV Video...well one of them was acting like a baby, and that's probably the one that thinks a fly in wine is ironic.
#3 Wine Tasting - It tastes ok going down, but after "tasting" too much I get sick and the second round of wine tasting begins, which is to say, I yak. After "tasting" nearly a bottle of cheap Merlot I was on my way home and had to pull over and let lose what "IRONICALLY" looked like coagulated blood balls. (Good thing it wasn't near my Chardonnay). The balls were actually matzah balls I didn't chew well enough. (I was trying to stop the burning of the acid reflux caused by the cheapest wine ever). Suddenly.....
#4 I found myself sitting in front of a hospital. What better place to get sick from drinking? The police would think you're just on your way to the ER for the flu, not because you've just ingested grape juice that sat a long long long time in a barrel in France.
#5 Red wine on tan carpet stinks, and stains. Stinky Stain. This right before a yearly family reunion 2 hours away driving in a car without an air conditioner in August. Matzah balls, though they may stay together going down, and coming back up, tend to fall apart when you try wiping them up with your sock. Also, be careful not to step on them once you've taken your shoes off to get your sock. It's so nasty. Slimy. So it was a slimy stink stain STUCK on my sockless shoeless sweaty foot skin.
#6 Bulimia is a lot of work and money for someone that doesn't even like to exercise. I mean you have to eat all this food (chew, chew, chew) then find a place to puke. Then clean up the mess. Why not just chew the food and not swallow? Spit the chewed food in a cup and feed it to underprivileged babies. Hey! It works for mamma birds. If someone is going to spend all that money on food just to get rid of it 5 minutes later, why not kill two birds with one stone and help those less fortunate that don't have teeth yet? Besides there's got to be a tax write off here somewhere for the donation. (That's 3 reasons not to swallow).
#7 If you were thinking a dirty comment about "3 reasons not to swallow" then you're truly strange. Overlooking the fact I've just said I think kd Lang should marry Vince and Amy Gill, I'll drink wine containing bugs, I've stepped on a puke matzah ball, and bulimics shouldn't swallow, they should spit the food in babies mouths....I think I'm pretty normal. Besides isn't "normal" relative?
Just a few thoughts.....
posted by SirTalksALot at 1/27/2005 12:40:00 PM
1 Comments:
Julie - I don't mind at all! The more the merrier, marry her, marry'er, mare e er, ...I mean that'd be swell!
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