Cotton Ball Consumption
If you've ever wondered how royal or Holy people take a dump, check out this site, hilarious!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/64705
Questions and Comments concerning Cotton Ball Consumption by Anorexics to stop hunger:
1. Are they getting the daily intake of fiber by doing that?
2. If they eat enough cotton, can they shit out a table cloth?
3. Do anorexics have and exchange cotton ball recipes?
4. Do they bring Cotton Ball Casserole to potlucks?
5. Does the cotton industry condone this consumption, because the slogan should then be changed to "The touch, The TASTE of cotton. The fabric of our diets."
6. I wonder if cotton farts smell like White Linen perfume?
7. Do they chew on the end of Q-Tips at parties like finger food/appetizers?
Could you imagine walking into a party attended by only anorexic cotton ball eaters? There'd be trays of cotton balls with toothpicks sticking out of them. Puff pastries would take on a new meaning. Wearing synthetic fibers would be required so nobody chomps down on someone's clothes! I made up the following song about this subject, enjoy!
I eat cotton balls and
I'm really really skinny
When I take a shit
It's like a spinning ginny
I cram in the white fiber
It makes me feel so full
The taste is so delicious
It could replace lima beans at school.
If I get real hungry
And there's no CVS in town
Better watch your gym socks
Cuz you know I'll munch 'em down.
Whoop! My song is ending
And it's been real dandy
Ooo it's time for dessert
Look! my favorite...cotton candy!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/64705
Questions and Comments concerning Cotton Ball Consumption by Anorexics to stop hunger:
1. Are they getting the daily intake of fiber by doing that?
2. If they eat enough cotton, can they shit out a table cloth?
3. Do anorexics have and exchange cotton ball recipes?
4. Do they bring Cotton Ball Casserole to potlucks?
5. Does the cotton industry condone this consumption, because the slogan should then be changed to "The touch, The TASTE of cotton. The fabric of our diets."
6. I wonder if cotton farts smell like White Linen perfume?
7. Do they chew on the end of Q-Tips at parties like finger food/appetizers?
Could you imagine walking into a party attended by only anorexic cotton ball eaters? There'd be trays of cotton balls with toothpicks sticking out of them. Puff pastries would take on a new meaning. Wearing synthetic fibers would be required so nobody chomps down on someone's clothes! I made up the following song about this subject, enjoy!
I eat cotton balls and
I'm really really skinny
When I take a shit
It's like a spinning ginny
I cram in the white fiber
It makes me feel so full
The taste is so delicious
It could replace lima beans at school.
If I get real hungry
And there's no CVS in town
Better watch your gym socks
Cuz you know I'll munch 'em down.
Whoop! My song is ending
And it's been real dandy
Ooo it's time for dessert
Look! my favorite...cotton candy!
posted by SirTalksALot at 5/11/2005 08:39:00 AM
7 Comments:
oh my god that's disturbing. how do they manage to SWALLOW them? i would think they would get ... well ... cotton mouth.
Actually, the trend is to dip them in sugar water and consume them that way. (Isn't that what we did for butterflies back in the day?) They get a little bit of a sugar pick-me-up, but a distinct lack of calories, especially if they use Splenda*.
A girl I knew in high school ate paper for the same reason. To this day, my younger sister still refers to her as "paper eater" in a very spaz-like manner anytime her name is mentioned.
LOL! Good one with the cotton mouth!
They probably have to dip them in butter or gravy, thus rendering the whole process useless.
Muse - So it's almost like eating cotton candy, except it doesn't melt in your mouth....hmmm. I might have to put that on the menu for the potluck tomorrow. Sounds easier to make than Dirt Cake was.
I forgot the little asterisk on the Splenda* mention....
*I'm sure that the makers and distributors do not condone or endorse the use of their product to be mixed with water and then used to coat cotton balls so skeevy uber-thin celebs like Paris Hilton can ingest them as a weight-loss device.
I feel so naive. I've never heard of this!!
Queenie - think rap-ish pronunciation (it works better that way) ;)
But I probably do pronounce it wrong, I am from WV. [no excuse, eh?]
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