A Case of the TYD's
-Do you ever play TYD with your drunk friends at the bar? You know, you point at the ugliest person in the room and say TYD (That's your date.) It was fun in elementary school (TYD - not being drunk), junior high, and has resurfaced as a favorite amongst post college age people. TYD, play it today!
-Prozac is the emotional Triple "A" for those having a nervous breakdown on the highway of life.
Speaking of nervous breakdowns....
-Brittany Spears is having a baby and I'm the one getting morning sickness from it! What gives? Thinking about her as a mom kills me. Hit me baby one more time....was a definite invitation for an abusive relationship, so I'm sure the next headline will be Brittany divorces and of course they'll play out the "Oops I did it again" song title YET another time. And, am I the only one that thinks "Not a Girl, not Yet a Woman" sounds like the theme song for a transvestite festival?
-If Muhammad Ali was all like "fly like a butterfly, sting like a bee" around me, I'd be all like:
SPLAT like a butterfly,
SPLAT like a bee
If you punch me in the face,
I'm gonna break-a your knee!
You know he'd be scared of me!...hello? Ok, maybe not. But y'all got my back right??
Why do I hear crickets and no rallying to my aid? I say that like I'm actually going to fight Muhammad Ali. BAM take that....and that! PUNCH! CRUNCH....R-iiiiii-P..... Uh, I was just playin', I was fighting with his poster and ripped it. He still won! He paper cut me! Big Butterfly-Bee-BEEOOOCH!
-Prozac is the emotional Triple "A" for those having a nervous breakdown on the highway of life.
Speaking of nervous breakdowns....
-Brittany Spears is having a baby and I'm the one getting morning sickness from it! What gives? Thinking about her as a mom kills me. Hit me baby one more time....was a definite invitation for an abusive relationship, so I'm sure the next headline will be Brittany divorces and of course they'll play out the "Oops I did it again" song title YET another time. And, am I the only one that thinks "Not a Girl, not Yet a Woman" sounds like the theme song for a transvestite festival?
-If Muhammad Ali was all like "fly like a butterfly, sting like a bee" around me, I'd be all like:
SPLAT like a butterfly,
SPLAT like a bee
If you punch me in the face,
I'm gonna break-a your knee!
You know he'd be scared of me!...hello? Ok, maybe not. But y'all got my back right??
Why do I hear crickets and no rallying to my aid? I say that like I'm actually going to fight Muhammad Ali. BAM take that....and that! PUNCH! CRUNCH....R-iiiiii-P..... Uh, I was just playin', I was fighting with his poster and ripped it. He still won! He paper cut me! Big Butterfly-Bee-BEEOOOCH!
posted by SirTalksALot at 4/14/2005 11:16:00 AM
6 Comments:
I hope motherhood calms Britney down because I have a 6 year old at home who wants to dress like her. She wants me to buy her clothes from "Slutette" and "Prosti-Tot" collections. You let a poster beat you up? Drink more milk.
I think this is one of those signs of the apocalypse. I know there are plenty others out there that have used the same line, but I really believe it.
your blog is fucking hilarious. sad to admit but you are often the highlight of my day. blog on!
rae
Amanda - Yeah that would be hilarious if she hired The Nanny (Fran Drescher). The kid would be saved from redneckiness to become a Jewish American Princess.
Tommy - Man, I doubt she'll be doing such a rigerous dance performance anymore with a baby sling on. Talk about milkshake!
More milk huh? But won't that dilute my White Russians? Cuz that's the only way I drink Cow Juice. (not really)
The Muse - Madonna having a baby scared me worse...that kid's going to be screwed up...think about breast feeding through a pointy metal bra! He'll probably grow up thinking he's a baby robot.
With Brittany, I just hope she doesn't wrap a boa constrictor around her neck WHILE she's breast feeding. She'll look really funny with a baby on one boob and a snake on the other.
Rae - Wow, thank you for your compliment! I'll pop over and see what's up in your world :)
Kristine - It SEEMS like metal would be more sanitary doesn't it...but we're talkin' Mandanna! I wonder if she was ever in a hurry and pulled that bullet bra out of the dryer hot and put it on...ssssssss.
**TO ALL READERS** AN APOLOGY***** I meant to write Britney Spears...not Brittany. I think the way I spelled in the blog is referring to a region in Great Britain....and Britain is where Madonna lives and Madonna ispires Britney...so...it's one visious circle!!! I'm getting dizzy...from the Sleazy carousel of thoughts.
I love the idea of this kid growing up full on red neck. Think about it mommy has mega bucks so its not like the cultured types where ever they go will publiclly turn up a nose. Maybe it will rub off on playdates and futre thurston howell III will be saying "y'all wanna go catch crawfish down by the crick"
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