TRIP - Monday, July 25 - SirTalksALot's 26th B-day
10:00 AM, I wake up. I eat breakfast. I get lathered in sun block and go to the beach. We all sit there in the sun, jump in the ocean, sit in the sun, lay in the sun, jump in the ocean. I'm of course, scoping out babes for miles with my eagle vision. "Hello Ladies.." I look down to reveal that I'm no longer just a white boy.....I've gone pink! BURN baby BURN! Yeah, dumb ass that I am, I forgot to reapply the 3rd coat of sunblock, and totally missed an entire side of my leg. Oh well, what fun is a beach trip if I can't get burnt?
Noon - I make the observation out loud that every year at the beach I realize why I told myself to work out, and every year I forget about it, and come back the next year fatter than before. I also realize why when you turn 50 your swim trunks are pulled up to your arm pits. It's because each year that you show up to the beach fatter, you pull the waist band up just a tiny bit to cover the extra bit of tire....so by 50 it's all they way up to your man boobs. Anyhow, my trunks aren't above my belly button yet....so I'm still halfway decent.
1:00 PM - We all go back to the pool, I apply 2 layers of sunblock and just lounge while drinking Corona's. Though I normally don't drink before I eat lunch, it's my birthday! C.H. decides to cut limes, though, I'd already cut some. Her's are so large they don't fit into the bottle without using a battering ram.
6:00 - 9:00PM - We go to dinner at some pier restaurant on the water. It's ok, not great, but D.D and D.B. say they're getting my tab for my birthday. Good guys, they are! Who am I to object? The menu consists of fishy things. I get a blackened tuna Caesar Salad. Yum. But prior to that, the drink menu touts the Nor'easter as a drink that will help you forget about an impending storm. Hmm, well, it's not going to rain anytime soon, but it was windy. I partake in the drinks. Me likes it! Me has 4 more, 2 blue long islands.
9ish-10ishPM - Stand around the bar drinking waiting for karaoke to start.
10:00 PM - A lady resembling a young Sharon Stone comes in with her younger twin sisters. D.D. talks to Sharon Stone.....I talk to the twins. After I sing my song "Pure Country" and say "OOOOPS" and slur the words, the twins don't talk to me anymore. I have a drunken way with women, I'll tell ya! I must have sucked! ha ha ha. By midnight I was wasted and everyone else was pooped too. We head back to the house to pass out (at least that's what I did).
Noon - I make the observation out loud that every year at the beach I realize why I told myself to work out, and every year I forget about it, and come back the next year fatter than before. I also realize why when you turn 50 your swim trunks are pulled up to your arm pits. It's because each year that you show up to the beach fatter, you pull the waist band up just a tiny bit to cover the extra bit of tire....so by 50 it's all they way up to your man boobs. Anyhow, my trunks aren't above my belly button yet....so I'm still halfway decent.
1:00 PM - We all go back to the pool, I apply 2 layers of sunblock and just lounge while drinking Corona's. Though I normally don't drink before I eat lunch, it's my birthday! C.H. decides to cut limes, though, I'd already cut some. Her's are so large they don't fit into the bottle without using a battering ram.
6:00 - 9:00PM - We go to dinner at some pier restaurant on the water. It's ok, not great, but D.D and D.B. say they're getting my tab for my birthday. Good guys, they are! Who am I to object? The menu consists of fishy things. I get a blackened tuna Caesar Salad. Yum. But prior to that, the drink menu touts the Nor'easter as a drink that will help you forget about an impending storm. Hmm, well, it's not going to rain anytime soon, but it was windy. I partake in the drinks. Me likes it! Me has 4 more, 2 blue long islands.
9ish-10ishPM - Stand around the bar drinking waiting for karaoke to start.
10:00 PM - A lady resembling a young Sharon Stone comes in with her younger twin sisters. D.D. talks to Sharon Stone.....I talk to the twins. After I sing my song "Pure Country" and say "OOOOPS" and slur the words, the twins don't talk to me anymore. I have a drunken way with women, I'll tell ya! I must have sucked! ha ha ha. By midnight I was wasted and everyone else was pooped too. We head back to the house to pass out (at least that's what I did).
posted by SirTalksALot at 8/02/2005 07:50:00 AM
8 Comments:
Too bad you can't join me & VK (aka Ms. Meh) at the beach in a couple of weeks. You'd be the perfect drunken addition - and would help balance out the current overload of estrogen.
yaaaaaaay birthday! and i hear you on the sparse sunblock. Every time I go to the beach I wind up with freakish burn lines from poorly applied sunblock.
sounds like a good time!
The first time I read this sentence, "C.H. decides to cut limes..." I SWORE it said, "C.H. decides to cut lines..."
OOOPS. ;)
Hey, my birthday's coming up...maybe I'll go to the beach. Oh, wait, that's right. The midwest SUCKS and there are NO BEACHES. I hate you.
I was rooting for you with the twins! It was your birthday ....
I'm with you there, Midwest Girl!! It is sad when the closest ocean beach involves severe car rides or an airplane.
Be careful about the 50-something jokes. My bathing suit is pulled up to my abdomen now; I guess my man boobs are next in a few years.
You young whipper snappers are so damned cocky.
Muse - Well...I could join you, I'd only have to sell one of my kidney's on the black market to fund the trip. ;)
e$ - Yeah, what's up with that? I have a big dark tan line beside my eye. Sunblock should be bright green so you know where you've applied it, then after 10 minutes it would fade.
webmiz - lines? What are you talking about (ha ha ha). Those would have been hyper good times!
AMG - There are beaches in Chicago. Ok, I just burst out laughing when I wrote that. You're right, the midwest sucks.
Becky - yep, it was a good time, and good people. Thank you!
DM Jack - I was rooting for myself too, but I think I was too clean cut for them....thanks for the "Go!" shouts, though!
Fred - This year was better than last year, but not because I worked out, just stopped drinking soda, and eating giant meals, oh and stopped eating so much Chipotle. Man boobs are funny, keep 'em growin'!
The key to sunlock is to put in on a half hour BEFORE you hit the sun, so your skin can absorb it.., I know, I know, it's a harsh rule that no one obeys... but it prevents needing eight layers... apply it when you're naked. I'm the burn queen, and I havent been burnt in years... except for the part in my hair... how the fuck do you suncreen that without having really bad hair? Remiond me to save my dog's Frontline applicator... that might just work!
I'm willing to bet you're fun to party with! I loves me some drinks... and I'll sing... if drunk enough! But I prefer a campfire and a couple of acoustics to amplified horror (when I sing, it is horror!) I sound much better when I haev some trees anbd a fire to back me up!
Glad you had fun! Happy Birthday!
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